Hello my friends,
Here’s me trying to revive my very much dead blog! How have you guys been? I hope all has been well while I was away. Today I’ll be going into a topic that is held rather close to my heart at the moment. Confession. Or more specifically, a declaration of adoration. Whether you are the one being confessed to, or the one confessing, I was wondering…. how would you be feeling?
I won’t even try to deny and say that I hadn’t had my fair share of experience confessing and getting confessed to, in fact I have experienced the latter recently, which obviously explains why I’m here, ferociously typing away on my keyboard on this subject. As someone who have confessed before, I had been rejected upfront, and also been led on and hurt time and again. This led to my belief that rejecting upfront is always the best option, so as to not waste the time and effort of the other party. They deserve so much more than someone who will never reciprocate to their feelings, given that we, the party being confessed to, have decided that we will never be able to feel the same to the party who confessed.
But then again, also being someone who has made advances towards my special friend despite the flat out rejections, I was just wondering…how much can these people being confessed to take before totally cutting themselves out from our lives? If, after being so straightforwardly rejected time and again, we still do not understand that our special friend is off limits and never will be the partner our heart yearns so much for, our so called “love” will no doubt become a burden to these people who can’t accept our special feelings. Should we spare a thought for these people, they are also undeserving of the burden they carry as a result of our unrequited love, because ultimately, we are the ones who fell for them.
Before I continue, I’d just like to say that I’m in no way blaming anyone for falling in love with someone, because loving someone should never be wrong. In fact, I think that it is an honour for someone to think so highly of us and think that we are worthy of their love. But it should never an obligation for the other party to return those feelings. Most importantly, to the ones being rejected, you should never (I repeat , NEVER) feel like you are insufficient or unworthy. In my opinion, the society has a very twisted perception of beauty- to be a pretty girl, you have to have huge eyes with long lashes, perfectly thick brows, high nose or at least a cute button nose, with luscious lips, flat belly, HUMONGOUS boobs and butt and slim legs. To be a handsome guy, you have to have thick brows, perfectly toned body, not too muscular or skinny. But in our individual eyes, “pretty” and “handsome” could hold its own set of meanings. People we view as divinely attractive may not even be the slightest bit attractive to others. As such, we should never put ourselves down even after a rejection, because our most beautiful traits that these special friends will never see could possibly be noticed by others who will cherish them in future.
Thinking back, it seems that flat out rejections are always a wake up reminder to tell us to stay strong and move on. To me, this type of rejections are always the best because despite being hurt and crying ourselves to sleep for some nights, we are clear about where we stand in the heart of the other party and will never make advances, which tend to backfire and hurt us later, again. Thus, to the one who once gave me such a reply, I am thankful. It was never fun thinking about the past and getting reminded about all those times someone led us on, tricking us into believing that we could actually hold a special place in their heart, when we clearly had no chance of winning the person’s heart over. It was a never-ending emotional roller coaster which ultimately lead me back to square one. I never wish that upon anyone.
To my friends who have ever been rejected, perhaps it is time we let go and dive into the ocean to find a fish that would stay for us, instead of choking the fish in hand with our iron grip, for “there are plenty of fishes in the sea”. The ocean, being so wide, I’m certain we’ll find a partner that would stay and brave through the hurricanes with us. But till then, always have an open mind and accepting heart, and don’t be afraid to love again in future.